The last thing a struggling parent needs to hear while caring for a child in crisis is another parent talking about how perfect their Little Suzie or Johnny is. What’s more comforting is the assurance that they’re not alone, and that others understand what they’re going through.
For nearly 25 years, Pleo – Parents’ Lifeline has been helping parents navigate the mental health system, offering support and strategies for coping, and providing non-judgmental understanding and listening.
“We’ve had parents calling us who are suicidal themselves because they’re so overwhelmed; they don’t know what to do, they don’t know how to cope,” Michelle Crogie, executive director of the “small but mighty” family peer support organization, said at Thursday’s Art of Support benefit. “You need the support, you need to feel that you’re not alone, because often you feel so isolated, that people don’t understand.”
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It was the first gala organized by Pleo. “I went from ‘Okay, we’re going to make money’ to ‘We better not lose money and let’s break even’ to ‘I think we’re going to make a little bit of money’ again,” Crogie told OBJ.social.
Some 180 attendees gathered for an evening of food, drinks, live music and a silent auction of donated art, held in the Alma Duncan Salon of the Ottawa Art Gallery. The benefit coincided with World Mental Health Day.
The fundraiser was emceed by community leader Jock Climie, a law partner at event sponsor Emond Harnden and a former CFL player. He was flexing his artistic muscles that night, though. He accompanied his 19-year-old daughter Maeven Climie as she showcased her musical talents, performing a mix of original and cover songs.
The healing power of art is something Maeven can relate to. “My music and my family are two of the most important things in my life, and I think it’s perfect that we’re celebrating that tonight,” she told her audience.
Major sponsors also included TD Bank, represented by community engagement manager Lee Rose. He lost his partner, Charles-Eric Laperrière, to suicide last year. Because Laperrière used art as a creative outlet, a reproduction of one of his sketches was featured in the silent auction.
Guests watched in awe as multi-disciplinary artist Allen André completed an entire painting. It was sold as part of the silent auction to the highest bidder, Pleo board chair and coaching professional Angela Fenton. There were more than 30 works up for grabs, including pieces from the Creative Space program run by the OAG in partnership with the Royal Ottawa Mental Health Centre.
Pleo began in a very organic way, with three CHEO moms meeting by happenstance in the waiting room of the children’s hospital. In 2000, the group was officially incorporated. Phyllis Grant-Parker, one of its co-founders, told OBJ.social how proud she is of Pleo’s growth and impact over the years.
Other supporters that night included David Godsoe from E18hteen Hospitality and DG Cuisine; CHEO’s Mari Teitelbaum and Andrea MacLean; TELUS Ottawa and Eastern Ontario board member Clarissa Arthur; and The Ottawa Cancer Foundation’s Deborah Lehmann. She rounded up a group of friends and colleagues to come out and support a cause close to her heart.
The speeches that night were very real and honest. Not only were they filled with emotion, but the audience’s reactions were equally heartfelt.
There was the loving father who lamented not learning about Pleo sooner. If he had, the situation might have turned out better for their son, who came into the family “with a lot of challenges” after being adopted as a young boy from the Children’s Aid Society.
During the pandemic, the son’s mental health went quickly downhill. He became violent, withdrawn and increasingly difficult to handle. He turned to drugs, and attempted suicide. “In the end, I had to call police and have him removed from the home … so that he was safe and that we were safe,” said the father.
Once the dad discovered Pleo, he received support and understanding from others who had similar experiences. “We found resources, we found solutions, we got help because of agencies like Pleo,” he said. “If we had access to the services earlier, we wouldn’t be where we are today. If we had known, then we wouldn’t be a broken family.”
Despite all the hardships, the father still holds out hope for his son, who is living in a shelter and struggling with addiction and alcohol use. He’s doing better, the father said.
“We’re still going to get through it,” he said. “He turns 18 in a month; he’s still alive, but it would be great if he was home.”
Wendy Maya first learned about Pleo from a poster she spotted in her doctor’s office. She was in a deep state of despair at the time. She had two young boys, both with a host of challenges. She placed a call to Pleo and immediately got a “kind and caring” voice at the other end of the line, the audience heard. “I felt heard and understood, and not alone in my pain,” said Maya. “That one call opened up so many doors for us.”
In 2017, Maya shared her lived experience at her workplace while Pleo raised awareness about how it provides support. She recently realized the impact of that day while speaking to a colleague who’d attended that session. “He looked at me and started to cry,” she recalled, sharing how he told her: “I reached out and got help through Pleo, and it saved my son’s life. I will forever be grateful.”
Said Maya: “You never truly know the impact that you have when you choose to share your story. Sharing lived experiences in mental health can help people feel understood, reduce stigma, provide valuable insights for managing their own challenges. They can offer hope and inspiration, reminding people that they’re not alone in their journey.”
Maya urged families not to give up. “There’s light, I promise you. I’ve been to the darkness … you can make it to the brighter days.”
And if her encouraging words weren’t enough, the hug that her son Pablo gave her after she stepped off the stage said it all.
